Patty pan squash & walnut kelp noodles

I found myself with patty pan squash and no idea what to do with it.

I’d never even seen it before, let alone cooked with it. I cruised a bunch of recipes, pulled out some cookbooks, discovered I was missing ingredients for everything I wanted to make, and eventually cobbled together this recipe, which ended up being delicious.

This is the first recipe I’ve ever created that was original enough and good enough that I wanted to share it with the world. I’m bursting with pride!

I used kelp noodles because I like them and they’re about 18 calories per bag, so I can go guilt-free wild with the walnuts, but I’m sure regular noodles would be fine too.

I used patty pan squash because it’s what I had, but I’m sure zucchini would be fine too.

Serves 1


1 small patty pan squash 1

1 12 oz. bag of kelp noodles 2

juice of 1 lime

1 egg

1 T. olive oil

2 T. dried cranberries

Candied Walnuts

1/2 c. walnuts 3

2 T. brown sugar

2 T. water

1 t. vanilla extract

a few shakes of salt


1/4 c. olive oil

1 T. tahini

1 T. ground coriander seeds

1/2 t. chili oil 4


Cut the squash into bite-sized cubes. Remove rind. Set aside.

Remove kelp noodles from bag, drain the packing liquid, and rinse.

Optional: Soak noodles in water plus the juice of one lime for about 30 minutes. This makes the noodles a little more noodle-like and a little less crunchy.

Making the walnuts

To make the candied walnuts, first dissolve the brown sugar in the water and add the vanilla and salt. Salt to taste; I don’t use much.

Toast the walnuts in a saucepan on the stove at medium high heat. Stir occasionally until they smell toasty. (~3 minutes?) Add the brown sugar mixture and immediately stir. Be careful; it will sizzle.

Keep stirring until the walnuts are coated and there is no more sugar liquid in the bottom of the pan. Pour the coated walnuts onto parchment paper on the countertop to cool. (You will have leftover candied walnuts. Store them in the refrigerator.)

I suppose you could also just buy candied walnuts.

Making the sauce 5

Pour the olive oil into a jar.

Add the tahini, ground coriander seeds, and chili oil. Stir.

The coriander seeds may settle, so be sure to stir the sauce right before you pour it over the other ingredients.

Scrambling the egg

Break the egg into a bowl and whisk.

Pour 1 T. of oil into the pan you used to candy the walnuts, and heat to medium high. Pour the egg into the hot pan and move it around with a spatula until it is done. (~1 to 2 min.?)


Drain the kelp noodles and put 2/3 on a plate.

Put the squash, walnuts, cranberries, and egg on top of the noodles. Pour half of the sauce over the top. Enjoy!


  1. I imagine any squash that tastes good raw would work.
  2. Kelp noodles are wonderful, but I imagine any noodle would work. I can only find them in the 12 oz. size, but that felt like too much for this recipe. You can store the extra noodles in water in the refrigerator for a few days. I often just throw them in salads. They are also good with peanut sauce.
  3. I actually have no idea how many walnuts I used. I just covered the bottom of a standard saucepan. If you want to make enough for just this recipe, use less. You can store the extra candied walnuts in the refrigerator.
  4. I didn’t have chili oil, so I made my own by mixing about 2 T. olive oil with about 2 T. chili flakes. I let it sit for ~15 minutes and then strained it through a coffee filter. Add this to taste and start with a tiny bit, using more if you want it spicier. I used maybe ~ 1/2 t. and stored the rest in the refrigerator.
  5. This makes two servings of sauce. I store it in the refrigerator and use it as a salad dressing.

Kelp noodle link is an affiliate link.

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Protected: Testing Grammar Pop HTML5

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Workshop: Social Media for Authors


Authors often ask me for advice about how to get started on social media or grow their followings. I have large social media followings myself, I’ve taught such classes at the University of Nevada and done independent studies with graduate students, and now I’m teaching a one-day workshop that is open to the public.

WHEN: Saturday, June 8. 10:00 am to ~4:00. (I will stick around at the end to answer questions.)

WHERE: South Valleys Public Library, 15650 Wedge Parkway, Reno, Nevada.

COST: The workshop is put on by the High Sierra Writers. The pre-lunch session is free, and the post-lunch (more in-depth session) is $30 for members and $50 for non-members. Lunch is not included.

The library does not allow groups to collect payment on site, so you need to pay in advance on the High Sierra Writers website.


In the free morning session, we’ll discuss the reasons you might want to use social media (it’s more than just selling your book!), and we’ll discuss the research that shows why readers would want to interact with you and help you on social media. Knowing why will help you make better posts—posts that people want to read and share.

In the afternoon session, we’ll get into the nuts and bolts of creating good posts on social media. I’ll show you examples from people who are doing it well, share resources to help you make better posts, help you find the right people to follow for your niche, and answer questions.

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Why is there no Android version of Grammar Pop?

Grammar Pop, Level 18

Grammar Pop, Level 18

I get asked this question a lot, and I’ll start by saying I have nothing “against” Android, and I wish Grammar Pop were available there as much as you do. Here’s why it isn’t:

1. I made the game in a way that makes it almost impossible for it to work with all the different Android devices.

When we got bids from developers to make Grammar Pop, they were all ridiculously out of reach, so I decided to make the game myself. This meant I had to learn how to make games, and as a beginner, I didn’t always make the most elegant programming choices.

This is a problem because I wrote the game so that it detects the screen size of your device and then resizes the game to make it look right. It was not a problem with the few iOS devices that existed at the time, but what I didn’t think of is that there are many, many different Android devices with different screen sizes. This causes two problems:

a) Hard coding all those screen sizes would take a long time and would very likely make the game run so slowly it wouldn’t be fun.

b) I can’t test the game on every Android device to make sure it works. And when I did try to make the game for Android (I definitely tried!), the first time I tested it on the appropriate device, it didn’t resize properly even though it had looked fine in a simulator, which makes me even more disinclined to release it into the wild without being able to test it on every device. I won’t release a product that is unlikely to work for some of the people who buy it.

2. People tell me the way we sell the game won’t work well on Android.

Grammar Pop doesn’t have ads or in-app purchases. You buy it and that’s it. People tell me that piracy is so common on Android that you can’t make money with an app that people just buy.

So if you’re wondering why I don’t just hire someone to make an Android version from scratch, this is one of the reasons. Also, see Part 1: developers are expensive.

Although people tell me they like the game, sales aren’t high enough to remotely justify the cost of hiring a developer to completely remake it, especially when it seems like sales from Android wouldn’t be as much as sales from iOS. (Also there are reasons we don’t want to add in-app purchases or ads to fix this problem.)

3. There’s some kind of problem with international sales tax.

My memory on this is fuzzy, but I also remember when we looked into this four years ago, there’s something like Apple takes care of all the international taxes for purchases through their app store and Android doesn’t. We definitely didn’t want to deal with filing lots of international taxes.

So there you go. I don’t hate Android or Android users. It would just be hard (if not impossible) to make the current app work on all the different devices, and there aren’t enough reasons to justify the cost of remaking it from scratch.

If for some reason you got this far, and you’d like the Apple version, here are the links:

Grammar Pop HD: This only works on the iPad, but if you are only going to play on the iPad, it’s laid out a bit nicer for the iPad than the other version.

Grammar Pop Universal: This works on all iOS devices.

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You’re going to want a Shnoodle

What? It’s only been two years since I posted to this blog and three years since I posted a video. Today, I had so much fun unboxing my huge Shnoodle inflatable red pen that I wanted to share it with you.

I saw it as part of a window display at the mall and knew I had to have it. I don’t even use a red pen when I edit, but this thing is adorable. Through the magic of Google and Amazon, I ordered it as soon as I got home, and today, it arrived. It’s everything I hoped it would be.

In case you want your very own Shnoodle (and who wouldn’t?), here’s a link:

That’s an affiliate link, so if you buy it, I’ll get something like $0.20, but that’s nothing compared to the joy I got from opening the box.

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E-book Analytics Is a Blindingly Obvious Market

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The End of The Bold Italic

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How to Pronounce Mignon Fogarty

When I recently interviewed someone with a difficult name, I spent about 30 minutes before the interview trying to find a file that had the proper pronunciation of his name. So I thought I’d make it easier for anyone who is trying to find the pronunciation of my name. (Click “play” below.)

How to Pronounce Mignon Fogarty

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The Death of Comments

Today, The Week announced that it is eliminating comments on its site, noting that “[T]he smartest, most thoughtful, and most spirited conversations are being driven not by pseudonymous avatars in the comments sections of news sites, but by real people using their real names on the social web.” The move is part of what’s starting to look like a trend:

Although the sites that more recently eliminated comments note that meaningful conversations have moved to social media, their announcements also included musings about the vitriol that will be familiar to anyone who has run a website—or heck, read a website. It’s no surprise that there’s a popular Twitter account called Don’t Read Comments.

Popular Science had a more interesting reason for eliminating comments: Studies have shown that negative comments, even just ad hominem attacks, can make readers have a more negative view the technology covered in the story.

In the past, website managers believed that a vibrant comment section helped drive traffic to a site and build brand loyalty and community. Today, beliefs are changing.

More Reading

Disabling comments: a debate that cuts to the core of online news


  • September, 2013: Popular Science “Uncivil comments not only polarized readers, but they often changed a participant’s interpretation of the news story itself.”
  • March, 2014: Copyblogger “[T]he conversation moved to a wider public platform.” [They also make a great argument about how time-wasting it is to deal with spam.]
  • November 2014: Re/Code “But we concluded that, as social media has continued its robust growth, the bulk of discussion of our stories is increasingly taking place there, making onsite comments less and less used and less and less useful.”
  • November, 2014: Reuters “Much of the well-informed and articulate discussion around news, as well as criticism or praise for stories, has moved to social media and online forums.”

In April of 2014, the Chicago Sun-Times announced it was making a major change to its commenting system. “[A]s anyone who has ever ventured into a comment thread can attest, these forums too often turn into a morass of negativity, racism, hate speech and general trollish behaviors that detract from the content.”


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Get Signed Grammar Girl Books. Order by Saturday

This Saturday I’m participating in Indies First and signing books at the Sundance Bookstore in Reno—and the store can take phone orders! That means you can call the store anytime before Saturday (November 29, 2014) at around 2:00 to buy a signed Grammar Girl book. They’ll take the order and ship you the book. In the past, people have told me these make great gifts for their children’s teachers, their writer friends, and language lovers in general.

To place your order, call Sundance Bookstore at 775-786-1188.

If you’re not sure which book you want, here’s a list of all my books and what makes each one different.

For more information, call the store (775-786-1188) or see the event page.

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